Ill-mannered owners walk their mutts anywhere and everywhere. Dogs were once strictly banned from food shops, but nowadays they are walked into shops, cafes, pubs and restaurants regardless.

I have just seen a poster advertising Bromley picture house, “the dog-friendly cinema”. “Bring your dog to our screenings”. Ridiculous.

What happens, I wonder, if the mutt starts yapping during a film.

I am looking forward to an advert for the dog-friendly undertaker.

“Take your best friend with you. We’ll arrange the double funeral.”